All For Erica at Christmas Read online

  “Ah, I see. The lone wolf?”

  “Something like that,” I say. Not wanting to get into the fact that I had no friends. I can’t help but wonder why the Captain is being so kind to me. I’ve done nothing to deserve it, then again, I did nothing to deserve the harsh treatment at work either. I grab my remote and switch it to Netflix and start the first episode of the show.

  I am eating my delicious pizza in silence when I can’t help but blurt out, “Why are you really here Captain? This is weird right?” I pause the tv and stand up, taking my plate to the sink. Standing with my back to counter, I wait for him to answer.

  “It would be weird if I hadn’t accepted your resignation. I just want you to know that there is something worth staying in Caraway for.”

  “What would that be? A job, that I basically quit today. Friends I don’t have? My family is dead! What the hell should I stay for?” I am angry. Tears threaten to let loose, but I can’t cry in front of this man. He is just staring at me. Unnerving me, even more than before.

  “Erica, you should stay here for me.” He looks up from his plate, and when his eyes meet mine, my knees almost give out.

  “Captain-” I begin, but he cuts me off.

  “My name is Colten, Erica. I expect you to use it. I am not your Captain anymore.”

  “Colt,” I say. Letting it settle in my mind.

  “Colt,” beginning again. Nope, still weird. “I can’t stay for you. I don’t want to go, but I can’t stay for something that isn’t real.”

  “You think this isn’t real Erica?” He says while standing up and walking over to me and grasping my arms with his much larger hands.

  “You think I haven’t had to curb every desire and impure thought I’ve had about you over the years you were under my command? I know you felt that jolt between us earlier. I feel it every damn day. I have been waiting patiently for you to come around, but I can’t wait anymore. Your resignation sealed your fate. I will spend every day for the rest of my life trying to keep you by my side.”

  “Wow,” I say because I don’t know what to say. He leans down and kisses me. It is my first kiss, and I am desperately grabbing onto the back of his neck and digging my nails into his skin. Once he ends the kiss, I am reeling. I grab the edge of the counter for support and again “Wow” is the only thing I can manage.

  “You like me?” I ask.

  “We can go with that for now.” He says with a smile.

  “How about I make you dinner tomorrow? My place? Do you like pasta? No, wait we just had pizza.”

  “I love pasta. Tomorrow is good. My boss gave me the weekend off.” She says cheekily.

  “You saucy girl. You, me and pasta at 7’oclock tomorrow night. My place.” He places a light kiss on my lips again.

  “Come on. I want to finish watching this show. I hate when Gemma is right. I’ll never hear the end of it if I don’t finish it. It’s funny.”

  “It’s my favorite show. Dwight is hilarious with all of the weird stuff he says.”

  When I sit back where I was, at the other end of the couch, I feel so alone. Instead of sitting where he was, he sits down in the middle of the couch where his large, warm body is pressed next to mine. When he drops his hand down to my hip, and his thumb begins making circles under my shirt, I feel a thumping in my core I’ve never felt before, and my body is like a live wire aware of every single touch. I feel strangely complete for the first time in years.

  Four

  Colt

  Leaving Erica at her door last night was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. All I wanted to do was take her home to meet Jolie, my French bulldog, and the only girl who holds a piece of my heart besides my momma and my sister.

  We watched maybe five episodes of The Office laughing and talking the entire time. It was refreshing to just be with a woman and not need to fill the silence with forced conversation or awkward touching. I knew from the moment I met her that she would be the one to fill my empty pieces. By the time the sixth episode began, Erica had fallen asleep in my arms. God, I want to spend every night just like that. Okay, we’d be ending it in our bed with me buried inside her, but we’d start them just like that.

  I was up early this morning getting everything ready for tonight. More than anything, I want Erica to feel like this is her home, or could be soon. Very soon, because being without her last night was torture. Hopefully, I’ll be able to convince her to move in with me before the new year rolls around.

  I bought this place when I retired from the Army four years ago. The intent was to rehab it and then flip it. The house took longer than I expected it would and after meeting Erica my goal morphed into getting it ready for our life together. I finally finished it in May, but I’ve held off painting and decorating. My momma and sister offered to do it, but I declined. I think in the back of my mind I knew I couldn’t do that part without Erica.

  It’s seven o’clock, and I’ve got the food prepared and ready to cook. When I hear the gravel crunch in the driveway Jolie is already barking at the door, pacing to be let out. I open the door, and Jolie zips out, rushing to meet our new guest. Erica gets out of her car wearing a flowy red shirt that could almost be considered a dress with leggings and knee-high boots. Her coat is open, and with the snow falling around her she looks so damn beautiful. Why does this girl make me think of all the depraved things I want to do to her even when she is fully dressed? That has never happened to me before. I pull myself from my thoughts when she starts talking.

  “Oh, my goodness. Is this Jolie?” Erica drops to her knees and immediately starts giving Jolie all her love. If I didn’t love Jolie as much as I do, I might be a little jealous.

  Erica looks up at me with a smile the size of Texas on her beautiful face. “She’s beautiful Colt.”

  “Thank you.”

  Reaching out my hand, I pull Erica up to stand, then hug her tight and place a kiss on the top of her head.

  “I missed you last night,” I whisper while nuzzling her neck and placing light nips down her nape.

  “Mmm, I missed you too. I wish you hadn’t left.” She manages while falling for my charm. I hold her for a minute longer, but when she shivers, I know it's time to get her in the house in front of the fire.

  Walking into the house, I take her coat and put her things on the coat rack.

  “Come, baby, let’s warm you up.”

  I take her hand in mine, needing her touch to settle me. I walk her through the house and point out the office and bathroom, before making it to the living room and in front of the fireplace.

  “Would you like a glass of wine? I’ve got a sauvignon blanc or a pinot noir.”

  She looks up at me with wide eyes. “Umm… Do you have white wine? I don’t really know what they’re called.”

  Her innocence is addicting, and I can’t help myself from getting a taste of Erica. Standing at over a foot taller than her, I have to bend down to place a kiss on her lips, but my woman meets me halfway. With one hand on her hip and the other behind her neck, I pull her to me and explore her lips with mine. I pull back and wipe her bottom lip with my thumb.

  “That. What was that for?” She stutters out.

  “Because you’re more beautiful than I’ve ever seen you babe and not kissing you wasn’t an option.”

  “Oh.”

  “I’ll get you a glass of white.” I kiss her forehead and leave her in front of the fireplace.

  While in the kitchen I put the pasta in the boiling water and stir the alfredo sauce. While I’m pouring the glass of wine for Erica, she comes into the kitchen.

  “Can I help? I feel useless out there by myself.”

  I guide her to a barstool seated at the counter I’m working at and set down her glass of wine in front of her.

  “Thank you, babe, but I’m making you dinner. Let me treat you the way you deserve to be treated. It won’t always be like this, sometimes you’ll cook while I’m still at the precinct and other times we’ll do it together
, but let me do it right this first time.”

  “You talk like this is going to be a regular thing.”

  “No. I talk like this is an everyday thing, because that’s exactly what it’s going to be.”

  I watch as Erica takes a sip of her wine and sets it down. Staring at her glass, she twirls the stem slowly between her fingers.

  “That’s very presumptuous of you Colt. You can’t know that this will work out. This is our second date, by the end of tonight you could realize I’m nothing like you thought I was.”

  “Not happening,” I growl.

  She takes another drink of her wine and sets it down. Looking out the back window she says “I know things happen you don’t plan for. Things happen that are out of our control. Why bother trying for anything that could be taken away without notice? I’m not betting on something that could hurt twice as bad.”

  She gets up and walks away in the direction of the door. Wait, what did she just say? Where is she going? By the time I make it to the door, she already has her coat on, and her purse slung over her shoulder. I can’t let her leave. How did this go wrong so fast?

  “Stop,” I say before she reaches for the door. My baby freezes on the spot.

  Walking up behind her, I take her purse and drop it to the floor. I place kisses on the back of her neck and slowly unbutton her jacket and slip it from her shoulders, dropping it onto her purse.

  I hold her from behind and say low, “Baby, please. I don’t know how that went so wrong, I’m sorry. Please give me a chance to show you how good we can be.”

  “What’s the point of any of this? Everyone always leaves me, by no fault of their own. An accident, old age, war. They are all gone.” She gasps and begins to cry.

  I can’t stand it anymore. I turn Erica around and pick her up in my arms and carry her bridal style to the living room. I sit on the couch with her in my lap.

  “Look at me, baby.” Once she looks at me, I dry her tears with the back of my fingers. I push her dark locks behind her ears, so I can see her pretty face.

  “I know a lot has happened to you. You’ve had too much taken from you at such a young age, and I can’t begin to understand what that’s like.”

  She shrugs her shoulders, and I hurt for her. Her acceptance of her pain and loss is unacceptable.

  “I can’t change your past. I can’t tell you what’s going to happen in the future. But baby I can promise you to do my very best to come home to you every night. I promise to hold onto us until death takes me. Our life won’t be perfect, it will be hard sometimes. I’m not scared of hard. I’d rather do hard with you than easy with anyone else. Do you hear me, Erica? I’m in this until it’s physically impossible for me not to be. I’m always going to fight for us, even if you don’t think you can. I’ll be what holds us together if there’s ever a point you doubt this. I’m giving you everything. All I’m asking is for you to have enough faith in me, in you, to open yourself up to our forever.”

  Five

  Erica

  What do you say to that? I’ve got a good man in front of me, begging me to just give us a chance. I lean forward and kiss him, softly at first. When he pushes his hands through my hair and pulls it to the side, and I moan in pleasure. He’s got my hair tangled tightly through his fingers, and he’s devouring me in the most erotic dance of tongues. I move off his lap to straddle him. When my heated core meets the steel pole between his legs as he pushes up, rubbing himself into me.

  Before this goes any further, we’re interrupted by a vague beeping sound. “What is that?” I ask hesitantly, pulling back from him. A part of me doesn’t want this to end, but another part is thankful that I didn’t just give him everything.

  “Shit, the oven timer.” He lifts me off his lap and sets me on the sofa. He kisses me on the forehead before walking to the kitchen to turn off the timer. I follow him, unable to stay put, and sit in the same barstool I was before.

  Somewhere between yesterday and today, my boss is opening up and showing me a side of him I never would have believed was there. I watch, astonished as he pulls mouth-watering bread from the oven. For the next fifteen minutes, I watch as he cooks the best damn looking shrimp alfredo I’ve ever seen. He places the tantalizing bowl of pasta on his small round table, then the freshly baked bread and a salad.

  “Come, Erica, before it gets cold.” He says, holding his hand out to me. I grab our glasses intent on helping, but he snatches them from me and puts them on the table. He pulls out my chair, scooting me in once I’m sitting. He goes back to the counter and grabs the open bottle of wine. I hold out both of our glasses while he tops them off, then takes a seat opposite me.

  “This looks fantastic Colt. I’m sorry I freaked out.”

  “No worries, baby. Thank you for giving me this chance to show you what your future will hold.” He holds out his glass to toast to us, caught up in the moment I can’t help but clink his glass with mine.

  “I feel something for you Colt. That’s why I’m here. I have to see what we could have.” I am determined not to let my fears get the best of me. He is so hot, but there is more to this man than meets the eye. I’d be a fool to let him slip through my fingers.

  “Will have,” he says, staring pointedly at me.

  I look away, taking a bite of my salad not ready to give into this fairytale moment. As soon as the dressing hits my tongue, I moan out loud. It’s incredible, there’s no way this isn’t homemade.

  “Did you make this dressing?”

  “I did. It’s my mother’s recipe. A balsamic vinaigrette. I’m glad you like it. I am going to love hearing you moan more often.”

  I blush. My skin feels like a furnace, and I love the compliments he’s giving me. “Everything tastes so good Colt. You are an amazing cook. I can cook basic things, but baking is my passion.”

  “Really? Good thing I have a sweet tooth. This is going to work out very well.” He says chuckling.

  Once we finish our meal, I help him do the dishes. While I’m in the middle of drying a plate, it strikes me how domestic tonight has been. I didn’t realize how much I craved this normalcy in my life. But I do. After the last pan is dried and put away, he kisses me passionately. More so than before and I melt into his arms. If he weren’t holding me, I know I would have slid to the floor. He backs me into the living room, and before I know it, I’m back on his lap, facing him. My hands are tangled in his hair.

  I become putty in his hands moving with him and following his every unspoken command. The pulsing in my core is almost painful with my desire for him.

  “Are you hurting baby? Does your little pussy need to feel better?”

  “I don’t know Colt. It feels so good and hurts at the same time. I need something.”

  “I know just what you need Erica. I’ll always know what you need. I’m going to be the only man who will ever give you relief. Do you hear me, Erica? I will be the only man for you. If you can’t give me this, I won’t let you come.”

  I try and rub myself up against him again, but he drops his hands to my hips and holds me away from him.

  “Erica. I won’t give this to you until you tell me what I need to hear. Promise me I’ll be the only one for you. Promise me, and I’ll let you come.”

  I’m snapped out of the stupor he placed me in, and I sit up straight ready to get off him. How dare he use this to get me to commit to him. Before I can move, he pulls me forward, so I’m an inch away from him.

  “You know that we’re it. Stop fighting this because you’re scared. Give in and let me love you. All you have to do is let down those walls and surrender to what you know will be our forever. I’m here Erica. I’m laying it all out. I will never purposely hurt you. I will always have your back. Always support you. I will be protective and honest. I’ll be everything you need, just fuckin’ let me in.”

  I nod, and it’s like I’ve flipped a switch. He flips us around, so I’m laying on the couch. He kisses down my neck and pulls my shirt up over my head.
He sucks my cotton covered nipple into his mouth, and I shudder beneath him. I’ve never had a man kiss me, let alone touch me. My body is in overdrive, and I’m lost in the euphoria he’s putting me in.

  “Touch me, baby. I need to feel your hands on me.” He rasps and pulls my nipple into his mouth while massaging my other breast.

  After a few seconds of doing nothing, “I don’t know what to do.” I say incredibly embarrassed, but I really don’t know what to do.

  “Look at me, Erica. Say it. Tell me I’m the only man who has ever touched you like this.”

  “I thought I made that clear before.” Isn’t that what we were just talking about?

  “Say it.”

  “You are the only man who has ever touched me, Colten.”

  “That’s fucking right. I’m the only man who will ever touch you. Goddamnit Erica, fuck, baby give me your hand.”

  I place my hand in his, and he pulls it up to his mouth and kisses it before he puts it on his jeans.

  “Unzip my pants baby. Good girl. Now unbutton them. Baby touch me, you aren’t going to hurt me, fuck, pull me out of my boxers and wrap your soft fingers around me.”

  I listen and do everything he tells me. With anyone else, I’d feel inadequate, but with him, I feel treasured. When I wrap my hand around his length, I can’t get my fingers around it. It’s so hard and soft at the same time. Touching him is the most intimate experience I’ve had, and I feel safe, literally, in his hands.

  “Like this baby. Squeeze me a little tighter.” He wraps his hand around mine and begins moving our hands “Fuck that’s it. You are so perfect, baby.”

  I smile at him and start doing it on my own. I love the way he’s so patient with me. Getting into a rhythm, he begins thrusting into my hand and kissing and licking up my neck.

  “I want to touch you. Can I feel how wet my pussy is? Hmm, baby?” He says before sucking my earlobe into his mouth, and I swear I have a mini orgasm on the spot. He pulls my leggings down to my knees. My tiny panties are soaked and are no match for his strong hands as he rips them from my body, tossing them to the floor. I gasp, and his lips find mine again.